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  What to do What to say
  State clear rules and limits and provide reasons. “I know you want to jump on the bed. But beds are for sleeping. You may go in the backyard and jump as much as you like.” [Age: 2 to 5 years]
“The rule is you put dirty clothes in the hamper because in our family we keep rooms clean.” [Age: 4 to 19]
  Re-establish clear routines for meals and bedtimes. “Remember dinner will be at 6:30. Don’t forget that your teacher sent home some homework and bedtime is still 8:00 p.m.” [Age: 5 to 10/11]
  Encourage friendships. “Let’s invite Susan to Skype with you.” [Age: 4 to 10/11]
  Encourage physical activity. “Let’s set up a track around the backyard. You can race with me now and then I will turn it into a garden path!”
“Do you remember the old bicycle in the garage? I found a youtube video showing how to make a wooden stand to turn it into a stationary exercise bike. Would you like to make it together and then you can ride at home?”
  Encourage helping others. “Would you like to make cards for your great-grandmother and her friends in the nursing home? We an make a video of them and send the video to Susan, the social worker, for everyone to see!” [Ages 3 to 12]

 

Erin Ratliff

Human Development and Family Science doctoral student

 

Other sources: Active Parenting First Five Years, Active Parenting Ages 5 to 12.

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